BOMBARDIER BEETLE
(Clarke / Wilde)

I’m Bombardier Beetle laying on my back
I say, I’m Bombardier Beetle laying on my back (hard to believe)
I’m the sole survivor of a dive bomb bird attack (preposterous)
And I’m Bombardier Beetle laying on my back
My mandibles are out, ready to strike
Or my poison blasting cannon
If the bird or his friends come back
It they ever come back, that is
Blasted birds

Oh I’m alright
I’ll be right as rain just as soon as you know it
Look at those birds
Running away?
Come back here, I’ll show you!
Avian menace!
Don’t worry about me
If someone could just come and turn me back over
No? Never mind, I’m alright
Jolly good actually
Just have to keep a stiff upper mandible, that’s all
My word
I’ll be back on my feet in no time
No, you’ve not heard the last from me
It’s just a little scrape
It’ll grow back
Apart from that I feel splendid
Yes, splendid! I tell you
Right as rain
This avian menace has got to stop, I tell you
Avian menace!
Oh dear